The Parents Promise helps parents make a positive commitment to their children today, in case of a relationship breakdown tomorrow.
It’s one of the greatest, least-recognized, health risks to our children.”
*Family Solutions Group, 2020
Why this is so important.
For children, whilst separation will bring inevitable feelings of loss and change, they can still thrive if their parents work in partnership to create the right conditions. We know that children are more likely to adapt with fewer problems, and less emotional distress, when parents are able to part with compassion and continue to work together in partnership even when they are not together.
280,000
Every year c280,000 children in the UK see their parents separate.
Family Solutions Group 2020
No 1 mental health issue for children
Nearly 1 in 5 (18%) children and young people in counselling were referred due to family breakdown or difficulties in home relationships (Spurgeons 2025). ‘Ongoing family tensions’ is one of the most common presenting issues in primary-age children who are referred for Place2Be’s one-to-one counselling (57%) (2025).
More children affected year on year
In 2019 there were over 200,000 Children’s Act orders made (an increase of over 11%), and over 50,000 private law cases (an increase of over 6%).
Ministry of Justice, 2020
Massive financial cost
The annual cost to the taxpayer of family breakdown is estimated to stand at £51bn (2018 figures), up from £37bn ten years ago.
The changes we are calling for
Every child has a need to be loved by both their parents and their wider families, the right not to have to choose one parent over the other and to be shielded from conflict and adult conversations. They have the right to have both parents working together to create the conditions for them to succeed. They have the right to be a child.
The creation of a culture in which we all play a part in protecting children from harm, and in helping them thrive, when parents separate.
Family wellbeing to become central to the conduct of government, business and all organisations. Employers should recognise the trauma of separation in their HR policies and provide more flexible work, and emotional support, during this period so that children affected are properly supported and their needs considered paramount.
An evidence-based approach to family breakdown, fuelled by a better understanding of the damage done to children through traumatic separations and the collection of data on the financial and emotional costs of family breakdown, including the mental health outcomes for adults and children involved in family law proceedings.
The Positive Parenting Alliance
The Positive Parenting Alliance is a group of organisations, and individuals, who believe that all children deserve the most positive experience possible during parental separation or divorce. Our aim is to create a genuinely child-focussed society and better systems to ensure the long-term wellbeing of children when parents separate.
James Hayhurst, Parents Promise Founder
